Santa Banta Jokes

Santa:
Doctor, Main subah 9 bajje uthta hoon to mujhe saans lene mein takleef hoti hai…

Doctor:
Beta.. jaldi utha karo…
Kyunki saari Oxygen to baba Ramdev aur unke chele kheench lete hain… takleef to aayegi hi na!!

:[D :[P

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Judge: Tumne iske paise kyun churaye?

Banta:
Maine paise nahin churaye
Isne khud hi diye the

Judge: Isne paise kab diye?

Banta: Jab maine ise bandook dikhayi!

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Santa ke hath mein naya phone dekhkar Banta bola:
Naya phone kab khareeda?

Santa: Naya nahin, Girlfriend ka hai!

Banta: Girlfriend ka phone kyun le aaya?

Santa:
Roj kehti thi, Mera phone nahin uthaate..!
Aaj mauka mila, to utha laaya!! 

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A Chinese man’s wife dies 1 year after marriage… 

Santa Sardar tries to console Chinese but doesn’t know what to say..!!

Sardar : Hota hai yaar. Chinese thi, aur kitna chalti…  :-:P

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John, walked into a bar around 9:58 pm. He sat down next to a Sardarji at the bar and stared up at the TV.

The 10 pm news was coming on. The news crew was covering the story of a man on the ledge of a large building preparing to jump.

The Sardarji looked at John and said, “Do you think he will jump ?”…

John said, “You know, I bet he will jump.”

The Sardarji replied, “Well, I bet he won’t.”

John placed a $20 bill on the bar and said, “You’re on !”

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Santa calls an ambulance because his mate Banta had been hit by a car…

Santa: ‘Get an ambulance here quick, he’s bleeding from his nose and ears and I think both his legs are broken.

Operator: ‘What is your location sir?’

Santa: ‘Outside 28 Connaught Place…

Operator: ‘How do you spell that sir?’

Silence…. (heavy breathing) and after a minute…

Operator: ‘Are you there sir?’

More heavy breathing and another minute later.

Operator: ‘Sir, can you hear me?’ This goes on for another few minutes until….

Operator: ‘Sir, please answer me. Can you still hear me?’

Santa: ‘Yes, sorry about that… I couldn’t spell Connaught place, so I just dragged him round to Minto road ….tussi Minto Road de spelling note karo.!!