Husband Wife Jokes

Advocate:Talak Karvane K Rs10,000 Lagenge.
Husband:Pagal Ho Kya?Pandit Ne Rs 101 Me Shadi Karvai Thi.
Advocat:Dekh Liya Na Saste Ka Natija.

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Pati patni mandir main!
Pati-tumne kya manga?
Patni-Ki aap aur main saat janam saath rahe.
Patni-Aur aapne.
Pati-Ye mera saatwa janam ho 

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1st Friend : My wife converted me toreligion.

2nd Friend : Really?

1st Friend : Yes. Until I married her I didnt believe in hell. 

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Wife:

India jao to saarhee bhejna,

Dubai jao to jewelry,

France jao to perfume!!


Husband ne jal ke kaha,

Or dozakh jaon to kia bhejon?


Wife:

APNI VIDEO 

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Patni – Collage ke bare me tumhara koi bura anubhav hai?
Pati – Han, Tumhari aur meri paheli mulakat college me he to hui thi. 

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Patni:- main tumse jo kuch bhi kahti hu tum ek kaan se sunkar doosre se nikaal dete ho.
Pati:-aur main tumse kuch bhi kahta hu to tum dono kaan se sunkar muh se nikaal deti ho. 

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Pati:-main jeevan main aaj jo kuch bhi bana hoon,apne aap bana hoon.
Patni:-lo, main aaj tak bekar hi bhagwaan ko kosti rahi. 

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Patni:-kyon jab main moti hojaaungi,tab bhi tum mujhe aise hi pyaar karoge?
Pati:-bilkul nahin, maine sirf such dukh main saath dene ka vaada kiya tha. 

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pati: Ghar ka saara keemti samaan kahin chhupa kar rakh do, padosi aa rahe hain.
patni: Kyonji ! kya Aapke dost chura lenge?
pati: are Nahin, who apna saaman pehchaan lenge.  

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patni: Aap bahut mote ho gaye ho.
pati: Tum bhi to kitni moti ho gayi ho.
patni: Main to maa banne wali hoon!
pati: Main bhi to baap banne wala hoon

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Patni: -suno ji,aapko mujhme kya achcha lagta hai. meri samajhdari ya meri beauty.
pati: -mujhe to tumhari ye mazak karne ki aadat bahot pasand hai. 

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Pati :- main tumhare saath kuch bhi share kar sakta hu.
Patni:-chalo phir bank account se start karte hain. 

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Pati:-mere mrne ke baad tumhe mere jaisa doosra aadmi nahin milega.
Patni:- tumhe kisne keh diya, ki main doosra aadmi tumhare jaisa chahti hoon. 

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Pati:-mere mrne ke baad tumhe mere jaisa doosra aadmi nahin milega.
Patni:- tumhe kisne keh diya, ki main doosra aadmi tumhare jaisa chahti hoon. 

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Husband wife ki godi me leta hua tha,
Wife – kesa lag raha he ji?
Husband- jese visnu bhagwan shesnaag ki god me lete ho. 

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kya larki thi... Shohar: Kal mere khuab main ek larki aai thi, Wah! kya larki thi. Bibi: Akeli he aai hogi? Shohar: Tumko kese pata: Bibi: Uska husband mere khuab main tha

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Pyar b ajab shay he

Maa se payar hota hai to Ebadat
Baap se payar hota hai  to Muqadas
Bhai se payar hota hai  to Aqidat
Didi  se payar hota hai ho to Farz
&
Wife  se payar  hota hai  to
sab kehte hen k SALA BIWI ka GHULAM H     hain